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Discover the Difference Nature Makes

In all things we pursue to make our products as natural as possible. Our hair, skin products and soaps are made from the milk of sacred goats from the heard of cyclops himself. Oils and herb gathered in the fields by drunken naked nymphs and the rest.. well those egg headed bastards in our labs preform some form of witch craft voodoo stuff we don’t understand but we are assured that their degrees they purchased online make them qualified.

Never Tested 
on Animals

Well obviously this is a bit loaded statement because we use it on ourselves and lets be honest we are f*c&ing apes.. We tested it on our selves, not the furies.. Well atleast not the ones in the animal kingdoms but im pretty sure we've probably sold this to yall kick ass weirdos that like the dress up like fido and get drug around on a leash by Olga the Ardvark at one of those con festivals.

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